31 May 2011


It is dark.
It is dark.
It is dark.
Even a torch would do the trick,
a single light in the consuming dark.
One versus infinity and light always wins--
for we fear what we cannot see,
and when the imagination takes the reigns
it fills in the blanks and creates what we fear,
what we despise. Long shadows and curly fingers
dictate the worst, helpless to regain control,
when down for the count, seeking out light,
only to be tortured by its elusive grasp
or burnt by its immense power, either way,
I'm trying to find that light that rests within.
Outside the window I see the setting light
and inevitably ahead the long, dark, night.
It is dark.

23 May 2011


It's been awhile, readers! I've been writing a short story and continuing the preliminary work on the novel. However, I can't deprive you guys for too long. So here is something to consider...

Forget about the self and suspend the ego
because life in the dark is boring and dark
and recognize the beauty and difficulty
in the existence of brothers and sisters
of friends, of lovers, of families, of religion.
Scrape off the rust and see that everything shines
and though brightest so in youth,
youth quickly gives way to naivety.
Responsibilities stack and stack, weighing heavily
on aching bones and aging minds
and so easily we forget how to be carefree
and we grapple with how to just "say"
because you unpack my boxes in a different manner
because that's how your father taught you.
The content may remain the same in essence,
but the subtexts, the ribbons we tie to those experiences
that which allots the capacity for uniqueness
and that which commands inherent beauty
may be difficult, but I wouldn't have it,
I wouldn't have you,
I wouldn't live,
any other way.

17 May 2011

Queens of Fire

Moving forward, ever forward.
Taking a shot at the sun
and failing. The faithful fall
on heavy knees with no words
but gossip. Fuck the naysayers
and failing. For words are words
with sharpened edge and implication.
They have tenacity and capacity,
the capacity to act intuitive to
that which finds themselves
convenient. Wildfire words.
Wildfire words. Some fires
can't be put out once they're
set in motion, no matter how
trivial their origin.

14 May 2011

Honest Eyes

Song of the Moment: Jimmy Eat World - Drugs or Me
Song for Awhile: The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize?

Let me preface my poem. Typically I wouldn't do so, but I feel as though I have to qualify something. I've been to hundreds of live concerts. I've seen acts spanning nearly every major genre. Tonight I was fortunate enough to see The Flaming Lips at The Fillmore in Detroit. By a landslide, this show was the most monumental/pivotal/enter-a-paramount-word-of-your-choosing to which I've bore witness. The show was bliss. Happiness. Optimism. Thanks, Wayne.

Honest Eyes

Honest eyes make blue skies
because their good nature,
and simple words see sharpest
because their poignant edge.

So why waste words when word will do
but more than do, what's best for you?
Lost is meaning, but never our means
in the word(s) we choose, evermore true.

And forget not how we forget about others
and act accordingly--on our own accord.
Two opinions are talking, within any talk
Decisions affect, and thereby effect.

So when every last one of them are gone
whether before or after your time, too,
remember to extend the hand of help
and know it will reach back out for you.

13 May 2011


The summer sun drains and fulfills,
enlightening while producing darkness
in the form of the shadows outstretched.
It is our star, just another speck of light
in the night skies abroad;
and with such immense power,
the kind that can hardly be grasped
we feel it's heat, on our skins
in our souls.
Setting both ablaze, hardening us
from the dangers that rest beyond.
This star is my brother,
consistant and fiercely loyal
through and through, it may go and hide
but never is it gone.
Always to return again, following me east
leading me west, infinitely playing tag
with it's sister, our moon.
Sol and Luna. Bring forth your lightness
In heart, in spirit, in being.

11 May 2011

Instances of Life

Song of the Moment: The Photographic - Millie Rode to Heaven on the Back of an Orca

Two separate moments were a frank reminder the extent to which life exists outside my own threshold of thought. A general disclaimer is that while I'm aware the extent to which living organisms exist and I'm not some kind of maniacal egotistical prick, I'm merely making commentary on the idea that one typically goes through his or her life under the constructs that all decisions somehow play into the formation of their human condition. Instead, these instances provided an eye-opening moment or two in which I believed to understand the world from the view of another.

The first took place on my bicycle. I was riding into work for the day. This is a fairly common occurrence only thrown off by the forecast of rain and even then it is debatable. I'm not going to pretend to be some conscientious bicycle operator. I don't wear a helmet, weave through traffic and switch between pavement and sidewalk at my convenience. Pass your judgments and let's move forward. So here I am, stuck at this intersection. It's quite a busy intersection at that. Morning rush is going on and everybody seems frazzled to get to work. The time reads 8:10. Michigan time? Not anymore.

The seconds seem to tick on slowly. Not for the sake of getting to work, that's already been addressed. Rather, it seems like the stoplight is never going to change. No level of biker's audacity could convince me to jet out into this river of metal and glass. We're talking a really busy intersection here. The kind that starts ticking the caution red high-five hand as soon as crossing is permitted. Needless to say, I was stuck. I surveyed the situation around me to figure out some sort of alternative. The road was divided so I always had the option of going halfway and waiting it out on the median, but the flow of cars from my left side was relentless. Looking further along, I noticed a black pick-up truck waiting to make a left-hand turn at the light's change to red. I'd have to account for her when I would finally get the opportunity to make my mad dash. This is the moment that it all came together. The light changed yellow and the flow of traffic was dammed by an invisible, unspoken wall that the light represented.

The next logical step would be for the woman in the black truck to make her move. A driver's trick. Can't run a red, unless you're already in the intersection and then you have to complete your action. A loophole to keep people from being endlessly stuck waiting to make a turn. It made me wonder how long it took to figure out this special clause. Ideally, some congressman or politician missed an important meeting on traffic law. Bittersweet and ironic.

What struck me as peculiar though is that the woman inched forward momentarily before reapplying the brakes and waiting. Her deviation from what I willed to happen in my head struck a chord and really made me consider the implications of my thoughts. Who was I to assume she would do anything? It just seemed so automatic, so natural because that's what I'd seen a million times before. It made me realize just how many decisions are made on so many fronts. I pondered for several moments what her rationale could possibly have been. Could it be attributed to some sort of personal issue she was experiencing or was it nothing more than indecision. A lack of action or reaction and the resulting consequence of waiting until the next green light.

I'll never be able to say with any degree of certainly, and in all likelihood she hasn't spared even a split second to consider the way in which I am conscious. It just seems to easy to let that slip into the wayside on a given day. It is for these reasons I find altruism to be a flawed belief. People act out of self-interest to some extent. They may be phenomenal people, giving up their happiness for others and whatnot, but what one must truly consider is how polarized differing minds work. This woman inspired me to write, but she could never anticipate that. All because she pumped the brakes and didn't act on a whim.

The second thing that further affirmed this was upon my arrival at the office. I locked up my bicycle and made my way up the steps, only to find myself face-to-face with a lethargic squirrel. By the looks of things, I'd just woken it up. Lazily sprawled across the cement, my initial instinct was that the creature was injured. Why would I jump to such a conclusion? I began contemplating this rationale and realized it was because I'd never been in a situation where I bore witness to waking up a squirrel from its sleep. I became hyper-aware of life at that moment.

There had never been an instance of such a thing happening in my lifetime. It was beautifully mundane, but so very important. Being alive is such a strange thing. Having the capacity, no matter how limited or free, to do what you want to do and not be driven by the strings of fate, or otherwise the guidelines and rules set forth throughout the span of one's existence. And to think, this all results from little bits of bioelectricity forming actions and sorting through memory. Then, realize that humans alone make up 7 billion (arguably) independently thinking creatures. That's just one species. It can be unbearable to try and wrap one's head around so much life and so many processes. It made me take a step back and think about how much I appreciate others. For their ability to act (or not), to inspire and mostly because there is so much vitality and importance on interaction between two beings.

09 May 2011


Dandelion wine and dandelion smile
Dandelion eyes won't you stay awhile?
Dandelion hair shining in the dandelion sun
Bet you can't pick just a dandelion one.

Melancholy fields bring a dandelion mellow
wandering through them a dandelion fellow.
So leaves its mark on my now dandelion hand
Yet I dare not act to dandelion withstand.

Thanks to you for changing my dandelion mind.
so that neither of us end up left dandelion behind
in a world that overlooks such dandelion appeal
I've found by slowing down; a dandelion ideal.

Dandelions and flowers, you see one in the same.
While others see weeds--a most atrocious claim!
Second to none, your vision rings true,
The beauty you see, I see in you.


Song of the moment: LCD Soundsystem - I Can Change


Such contradictory advice comes our way as life progresses. One must sift through the experiences of others in order to make a judgment as to its applicability to our own state-of-being. A constant flow of information bombards our senses, notions and driving beliefs. What piques my interest about such intricacies is how that information gets lost in transport from one vessel to another. It is inevitable as there is no conceivable way to date that one can directly implant experience into another. Thank God for that. How boring life would become should we ever stumble across that technology. It would be the essence of creating a flawed utopia. Mistakes would cease to exist under the assumption that free-will would be driven by nothing more than consequences and memory.

One thing I find particularly of interest is the way in which we must stand our ground. Or not. It is the ultimate dilemma in terms of decision-making. Does one stick to their figurative guns and always assert their originality and authenticity in what makes them individual? Or otherwise are they obligated to expand their horizons, open their doors, let others influence the way they live their life. The real answer is that there is no answer. Some shade of grey that falls on neither end of the spectrum. Pardon the cliche Disney quote, but it is important to always "Remember who you are." Always keep that in mind and stay true to what makes you you. Compromising that puts one's existence in turmoil, as it is important to anchor life in that which one already knows.

On the flip side, don't be closed-minded. There is a difference in fundamentally altering oneself and adapting to the world surrounding. Try new things, experiment, and most importantly, make mistakes. Make mistakes so that you can learn what not to do next time. I believe wholeheartedly that those who take risks have a strategic edge over those who live conservatively. Some rationalize high standards, but at the same time, how high can the standards really be? If an individual so very carefully makes life decisions based on high criteria towards others, who is to say that said individual doesn't see you under those same high standards? That is to say, without mistakes, learning experiences and personal growth, one lacks the reciprocation of that which they're passing judgment upon.

Life is in binary opposition. The polarized ends exist to counter and balance. Balance is underrated. Have fun, go get fucked up, do the things you want to do. At the same time, take some time to slow things down, take a deep breath, enjoy the little things. It'll put things on an even keel. Some of the most important people in my life are those who help me achieve balance and vice versa. I can think of nothing that makes me more appreciative than a friend who knows how to really make me think in an unconventional way, either changing the scope of my focus to something more macro--the universe or collective conscious--or otherwise the micro, the smallest life that exists right in front of all of us, typically going by unnoticed in our fast paced means of living.

Find the balance. Throw some extra weight on one side and then work hard to get it back to equilibrium. Keep things fun. The arms of the scale are never one-sided. Keeping that in mind, don't be afraid to pursue something that doesn't match up with the norms. Normal is boring. Boring. Boring. Boring. You might go out and try something new, and you might fail, but at least you'll have valuable insight.

06 May 2011


Leaves of grass and bladed tongue,
what do and did can't be undone.
So when all things fall into place
consider it not a saving Grace.
But rather know what lies ahead
the sands trickling til we're dead
are all that buffers now from when
lessons over lessons again and again.
Pure chaos//parallel lines,
until they aren't.

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